For Black millennials navigating the wild world of modern romance…
Let’s be honest—dating in 2025 feels like a mix between “Insecure,” “Get Out,” and a TikTok confessional with no filter. Whether you’re dodging red flags or sending a “Did you get home safe?” text that doubles as a wellness check, we all know the dating streets can be dangerous. But it doesn’t have to be a horror show every time you swipe, match, or meet someone “through a friend.”
Social media is flooded with dating horror stories that range from hilarious to just plain horrifying—and it’s not just Gen Z or our elders in the mix. Black millennials are sharing their fair share, too, like this unforgettable gem from Threads user @feewill1978:
“I suggested a dollar theater date last night (bc it was intimate & interesting) they had 50 cent Sunday’s. So we went last night. We get to the ticket booth & he goes ahead of me to pay, breaks $1 to get ONE ticket & steps to the side so I can pay.]”
Sir… not one ticket. 😩
We deserve better. And while love might be unpredictable, protecting your peace (and pockets) doesn’t have to be. Here are 10 tips to avoid becoming the star of your own dating horror story while still staying hopeful for your happy ending:
1. Vet like your heart depends on it—because it does
Before that first link-up, do a lil’ research. Check their social media, ask mutual friends, and trust your intuition. Energy never lies—if something feels off, it probably is.
2. Set your standards and don’t budge
Want a partner who communicates, respects your time, and actually plans a date? Say that. And stick to it. Love shouldn’t feel like a compromise of your core needs.
3. Watch how they treat service workers
How they treat a waitress, Uber driver, or that cashier at the dollar theater (👀) says everything. Kindness is free, and if they can’t even pay for two tickets, run.
4. Never ignore the “soft no” in your spirit
Sometimes the vibe is cute, but something’s still off. Don’t gaslight yourself into giving second chances to someone who disrespects your boundaries.
5. Talk money early—but casually
You don’t need to go full financial advisor on date one, but casual convos about career goals, budgeting, and spending habits can save you from future surprises.
6. Let them show you who they are
Don’t fill in the blanks. If they say they’re “not looking for anything serious” or keep ghosting between dates, believe them. You don’t have to wait around for potential.
7. Protect your location—and your energy
Always meet in public at first. Share your location with a friend. And remember: your time is precious. Don’t waste it on someone who makes you feel unsure or unsafe.
8. Ask questions, not just “vibe”
Chemistry is cute, but compatibility lasts. Ask about their views on family, spirituality, kids, healing, therapy—whatever matters to you.
9. Don’t be afraid to walk away mid-date
Seriously. If someone makes you uncomfortable, disrespects you, or gives broke energy (not financially—spiritually), you can leave. Gracefully or dramatically—your choice.
10. Stay open, but don’t ignore the data
Yes, the horror stories are loud online. But plenty of people are still falling in love every day. Stay hopeful, but move smart. Your story doesn’t have to go viral to be beautiful.
Whether you’re “just outside” or swiping between meetings, remember this: love isn’t supposed to drain you, confuse you, or have you CashApp-ing someone back for half a taco. Keep your head high, your heart open, and your standards firm. Because while the streets may be wild, your person is out there. And they’ll definitely buy both movie tickets.
Cover photo: 10 Tips to Dodge Dating Disasters While Holding Out for Real Love/ Photo credit: Diego Cervo/iStock